There’s a lot of advice on how to get over a breakup, but what about situations where you have to date someone you were interested in and barely knew Maybe you developed feelings for someone you chatted with online for a few weeks, but then it disappeared before the first date and date. Or you were really excited about someone you dated a handful of times, but it never led to anything serious and your feelings weren’t reciprocated.Maybe that person caught your eye and you can’t stop your mind from thinking about what could have been. Regardless of the specifics, you may find yourself obsessing over this person and feeling stuck. Getting over someone you haven’t had a chance to date or someone you haven’t dated for very long can always be a difficult and emotional journey. Here are four tips for moving on and getting over someone you don’t know well, but who feels intensely attracted to
First and foremost, be compassionate with yourself when dealing with rejection.
What’s important here is allowing yourself to feel the pain of rejection without getting stuck or avoiding what you’re feeling. Rejection stings. The loss hurts. Even if you feel ridiculous about being invested in someone you don’t know well, the truth being rejected by someone you’ve never met or barely know can also be upsetting, especially if you had high hopes. It’s natural to feel disappointed when something potentially exciting doesn’t work out. Give yourself permission to acknowledge your feelings without judgment. If you feel hurt, your pain will only linger. It will also impact your confidence. If you are able to feel your emotions, they will pass sooner and you can carry on and leave with a clean slate. Consider signing up on a platform.
Recognize how your feelings for this person are mostly based on fantasy
As mentioned above, you may feel upset that the relationship isn’t taking off or missing an opportunity to get to know someone you think might be your ideal person. However, it is important to note that the majority of your feelings towards this person and your ideas about them come from your own story. You’re likely romanticizing what it would be like to date this person, which would make them more attractive than they really are. Our brains don’t do well with uncertainty, and we’re very good at theorizing, guessing, and creating stories. So many of your assumptions and fantasies sit in your mind due to gaps in concrete information. Do a reality check and remember that you may feel disappointed, but much of your interest in that person can be fueled by your perception. In reality, that person may actually be closer to stranger status than friend status. Much of what you fantasize about may not be accurate, so letting go of your thoughts and addressing how they impact your feelings are crucial steps in moving forward.
Awareness
Understand that focusing on one specific person will keep you closed off from others and prevent you from being present for other conversations and dates. Obsession with a particular person is bound to go away you are less receptive to other potential partners. You might be tempted to avoid dating altogether or feel generally unmotivated. If you go on dates, you can be closed off, distracted, disinterested, or just going through the motions, not really giving your dates a fair chance to get to know you. You can compare each potential partner to the person you are trying to get over, which makes you very difficult and harsh towards others. Being aware that all of the above results can happen if you’re stuck on one person is key to taking the necessary steps to move on and let go. This awareness will also help you commit to these habits.
Progress towards acceptance
Put yourself out there and don’t give up on your dating and relationship goals. Remember to register on apps to find a gay discussion. Allow yourself to cry, feel upset and unmotivated, and take a break from dating if you need time to heal and readjust your expectations. Aim for acceptance. Letting go of this person may seem like a temporary setback, but staying aligned with your goals and values will lead to trust and intentional action.
Getting over someone you don’t know well might not be the same level of heartbreak as the end of a long-term relationship, but it can still be difficult. Responding to your thoughts and feelings in healthy ways and questioning yourself when you find yourself in a fantasy world will help ease your pain and allow you to come back.
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